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Hillary Clinton is a squid. She masquerades as a human using a sophisticated (but still flawed, as we shall see) people suit, which not only conceals her true identity but enables her to "breathe" out of the watery depths from whence she came.

The first evidence we can see of this is in her hair. Hillary's hair is a frosted dirty blonde color. This is no accident. It's done this way to attempt to conceal one of the most obvious flaws of her disguise: ink leakage.

Hillary's suit was designed to have some ventilation in order to keep her horrible, rubbery squid skin from becoming sweaty and smelly. The obvious place to allow such ventilation was at the point where the hair was attached, because each individual follicle needed to penetrate the suit's scalp anyway. This, however, had the unfortunate side effect of letting the ink she secretes when she feels threatened seep through these ventilation holes.

In the two photos above, we can see that her hair becomes suddenly much darker near the scalp. The frosting effect obviates this a bit, but in some images, like those above, we can see the ink almost beginning to run down her forehead.

We believe that this problem is only kept from going out of control by a complex system of pumps installed in the face of the suit. Of course, controlling the pumps would be a very obvious thing if she did it with her "hands"... therefore, a clever method was introduced. Hillary controls the pumps via facial contortions.

In the early stages, as the following two images show, these contortions looked unnatural, almost inhuman.

Upon observing the negative reactions to these signals, Hillary attempted to better understand human facial expressions and slightly improved upon the look of the signals.


As you can see, in these images the ink has begun to recede, due to the pump system embedded in Hillary's face.

However, the complex nature of this system has led on at least one occasion to a malfunction. The pumps became stuck in the "on" state, leading to deformation of Hillary's face mask. The following image would be disturbing to anyone who didn't know the truth, as we do.

Notice that there is extremely little ink visible at the intersection of hair and scalp. It has all been sucked back into the suit, and then some. Hillary is desperately trying to perform the facial gesture to turn the pumps off, but it becomes difficult due to the powerful suction.

Over the years,Hillary has slipped up a few times of her own accord. Observe what happens when she forgets to put in her "human" contact lenses:

Chilling, to say the least. Most photographs depicting her true eyes are modified before publication to show more human-looking eyes.

One of Hillary's Halloween costumes also gives a clue to her true nature:

The tentacular appearance of her hair accessories is no coincidence. Is this Hillary's conscience subconsciously attempting to reveal her true identity? Is she simply toying with us?

An anonymous informant claiming to work for the company that produces parts for Hillary's suit has stepped forward and released this image of a prototype head. Allegedly Hillary rejected the prototype as "not realistic enough" and demanded that it look "absolutely human ... so convincing that other humans won't be able to tell the difference."

We can see that the basic idea was there, but it needed to be further refined.


Hillary requires a team of human slaves to get her in and out of her people suit every day. Obviously these humans must not be able to leak this information to the public, and so she selects individuals who only speak Spanish or Turkish or some other language civilized people don't use. Notice in the following photograph, which we obtained at great personal cost and show to you at great personal risk, that all of the humans pictured have skin of various shades of brown.

There you have it, folks. Incontrovertible proof that Hillary Clinton is indeed a squid monster wearing a people suit. Who can know her true agenda? Only the krill. And she's got the whales after them.